World Premier

This is Sandi walking down the red carpet at the World Premier of  Disney's "Secretariat" last night at the El Capitan Theatre in Hollywood.  No one does movie premier's like Disney and there is no place like downtown Hollywood for a movie premier. I am not often invited to these sort of events but I am always dazzled by the spectacle when I do get the chance.

We entered the theatre through an actual racetrack starting gate with the scoreboard depicting Secretariat's win at Belmonte reproduced in full scale.  The premier and the party afterwards can sometimes be better than the movie.  Not in this case.  I thought the movie was great.  Directed by Randall Wallace it is a true life story of the greatest athlete in history, the last Triple Crown winner, Secretariat.  It is also the story of his owner, the woman who smashed the male dominated glass ceiling of horse racing. 

I think Wallace and Disney were a good fit for this story.  Randy with a sense of honor and heart working for the studio that lends its name only to those ideas worthy enough for the Disney name above the title.  

There are some shots of this beautiful Big Red horse that are glamorous enough to even get the attention of a non-horse person like myself.  And even though the outcome of some of Secretariat's races are well known, Randy was able to create the tension of pulling for the horse who always came from behind like you were actually there.  In one case Randall decided to show the actual television footage of one of Secretariat's wins, which is great.  It lends to the legitimacy of the entire story. 

There are great performances by Diane Lane and John Malkovich the owner and trainer of the horse respectively, but for me the stand out was the performance of Nelsan Ellis who plays Eddie Sweat the handler/groomsman of Big Red. His love for this horse lights every second of the film as he becomes the personified consciousness of the Champ. 

I really have no objectivity since I am a Randall Wallace friend and fan, and a premier audience is stacked to be positive, but I liked it and hope is does really well for everyone involved.  I had a great time, so did Sandi and the Boys. A rare family outing to a traditional Hollywood event.

As you were,

Jay 

Brookledge Theatre

The most exclusive theatre in Los Angeles happens to be the most famous address in Magic.  You can read more about the famous Brookledge theatre in an LA Times article which ran a couple weeks ago.

I was asked to perform at this month's presentation, of the Brookledge Follies last Friday,  September 24th. This happened to coincide with the birthday party of Irene Larson (Princess and landlord of the property) as well. There was no mention of age and no candles on the cake for the senior blond who speaks with Marlene Dietrich's accent.  

This is a picture of me and Mike Caveney on stage setting some props before the audience arrived.  Mike, friend and fellow member of the Left-Handed League, lent his talents to play Bill Toob the Master of Ceremonies.  Mike pointed out a couch in the back of the room where Orson Wells used to hold court and do slight of hand. 

Brookledge Theatre was the inspiration to the creation of the Magic Castle started by Irene Larson's husband Bill and his brother Milt who grew up in this magical mansion. Milt was in attendance and provided the champagne for the evening.  I wish I had recorded the stories he told about his memories of the old house.

Originally it was the demonstration studio of Floyd Thayer, famous magician and builder of magical effects and props. When a client wanted to see what the effect would look like on stage they merely had to look up to see Thayer perform it.  That was back in the 1910 and 20's. Today the theatre has been designated a State Historical site and was rarely used until Erika Larsen, grand daughter Bill Larsen senior who acquired the house from Thayer, decided to produce shows again once a month.

The Sept. Brookledge Follies show was great fun.  It was a vaudeville show in all its glory with magic, singing, comedy and ventriloquism. The "by invitation only" audience was a noted group of new performers like Brett.... the youngest sword swallower in the world, to veterans like Sigfried, the Sigfried half of Sigfried and Roy. Mike Lacey, owner of the Comedy and Magic Club, and wife Kathy were there.  Magic Castle board members and luminaries dotted the audience.The rumor is that Steve Martin wasn't there because the guest list was full by the time he expressed interest in coming.  I thought there was room for one more, but it really is an exclusive show and the theatre has less than 70 seats in its intimacy.

Outside the theatre the grounds include several levels of steps and bridges, with stone work, trees and lots of Gnomes and witches in effigy. A virgin section of the LA river runs through the grounds and literally under the theatre which gives the whole area an other worldly patina.  The river is the reason for the name.. Bookledge, since it does indeed occupy the ledge of the brook.  

All theatres are haunted and the older they are the more visceral the ghostly feelings.  This one is spook central and one day I hope to commune with these shades when there are no other humans around.

What a great honor and excitement to do this show and perform on this stage.

As you were,

Jay     

Information:  Several people have asked about the red case I wrote about last week. It is a hard case built by Victorinox... the Swiss Army Knife company ~ JKJ

A Thousand Words 

I figure my average blog entry averages about 500 words on any given day. So the quote goes "a picture is worth a thousand words".  If that is true then here is a picture what will make up for two days worth of blogging.  Often I just draw, sketch and paint "objects", but once in a while a piece says exactly what I want it to say.  I wish that would happen more but I am excited when it does.  This picture was inspired by John McClean's lecture on Sunday.  I call it "The Road to Why".  I sit looking at it wondering how many words it would take to explain it.

As you were,
Jay

Ode to the Unknown Photo

I have my computer screen saver set to randomly select pictures I have taken and show them in a montage. When I return to the computer from a break it is great to see a screen full of memories. 

There are times when one picture is partially hidden behind another and I want to click on it to see it better, but of course that disengages the screen saver and that random set of pictures disappears.  It could be a long time before I see a particular picture again if I don't hunt for it in the file.

Then there is the occasional shot that appears for which I have no memory nor explanation. (Like the one above). It looks like it could have been an accidental shot, but I do not recognize this wall, fence or whatever it is. I don't know when I was there.  I guess I can make up any story I want.  I just wish it was a little more compelling than a concrete wall.

As you were,

Jay

Happy Birthday Taylor

Happy birthday Sonny

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Harvest Moon

On Monday when we were having dinner on the ship,  we had a lovely table that looked over the ocean. The waitress looked out the window and said, "Oh look it is a full moon."  Sandi laughed and then gave me a look which I have come to know means... "leave it alone".  That is because I am a "moon phase dilettante".  It was not a full moon, and in fact several days away from it. Normally I would have corrected anyone who tries to claim a full moon when it is simply waxing.

I was born in the middle of July on the night of a full moon,  so I am a moon child by birth.  I didn't always know my astronomical connection to the moon, but I was fascinated by the moon from the moment I knew what it was.  

It was no accident for me that Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin landed on the moon in the month of July the week of my birthday.  It all seemed to make sense to me.  When I was working clubs the excuse for a really good crowd, or a really bad crowd, or a really rowdy crowd was "Full moon".  There are more babies born during a full moon than most other times of the month. There is more crime, more accidents and more suicides during a full moon. 

Since the moon phase and orbit affects the tides, the moon controls the cycle of many different types of sea life.  The grunion run on a full moon, certain clams only open during a full moon.  The more you look at it more the moon seems to affect a lot on the earth.  

Last night was a rare Harvest Moon.  According to Wikipedia here is some information on the Harvest moon:

The Harvest Moon comes soon before or soon after the autumnal equinox. It is simply the full moon closest to that equinox. About once every four years it occurs in October (in the northern hemisphere), depending on the cycles of the moon. Currently, the latest the Harvest Moon can occur is on October 7.

In 2010, in the United States, the Harvest Moon happens in the early morning hours of Sept 23, only 5 1/2 hours after the autumnal equinox.

The emphasis is mine. This year, for the first time since the 50's the Harvest Moon was actually on autumnal equinox. I'm not sure what that means symbolically but since it doesn't happen that often I like to think that it is a very good omen, especially for us moon children.

The reason it is called a Harvest moon is because a full moon during the harvest time of the year allowed farmers to extend the hours of their harvest until after dark because it lit up the field.

This is a picture I took of the Harvest moon as it crested above the trees across the street.  No picture really does the moon justice, and especially this one.  However, I wanted to document the phenomenon. To have seen this site in person, the moon would have seemed ten times bigger and much more orange. The next full moon will occur in the United States on Friday, October 22, 2010.  I'll be waiting.

As you were,

Jay

Self Portrait 

I think I have several photos like this.  Me taken by me at some memorable place. However, that will change soon.  

Friends Shane and Scott happened to be traveling on the same ship I performed on over the Weekend.  It was just one of those fateful bookings. They had planned the trip for a long time and I was booked last minute to fill in for a couple of days.  Sandi went with me and we had a great time actually being passengers with our friends. 

Scott had a really cool table top tripod for his camera and took several timer shots of the four of us.  It folded up to a size not much longer than the digital camera itself and was very discreet.  Sandi and I both thought it was a great idea, and lusted openly for it. 

The next day we met Scott and Shane for dinner and they gave us one of those cool tripods.  I guess they had two on the trip and just needed one.  So now I will be able to be in some of the pictures I take from now on.  Thanks to TheBoyce for a very early Christmas gift.  It was a pleasure to hang with you on the "Radiance of the Rhapsody"...

As you were,

Jay

My Love for the TSA

So this is a new" head case" I just got to carry Bob, Darwin and the other boys on. It replaces a pelican case that was great but just a few inched too small to fit everything comfortably. Although I often got hassled at the TSA with the old case usually an explosive test was all that was needed. Suddenly with this case at San Francisco airport they wanted take everything out, test each puppet and then run them back through the Xray individually. When I made a move to unpack the case this over weight woman in a security uniform meant for a much smaller human told me I couldn't touch the case. I backed off knowing that it was locked. She struggled for a moment. I told her it was locked with a TSA friendly lock. I thought that meant that the TSA had a master key to open it. They may but she was clueless. She allowed me to enter the combination but still could not get it open. Finally I sort of pushed past her and opened it. As I am taking things out carefully she is telling me I can't touch anything. As she starts to grab puppets to throw on the moving beltway I objected. I said," Mam the reason they are in a case is so they won't get damaged. You can't just throw them around." She said, "do I need to call a supervisor?" I said you bet.

He and I worked it out so that I could pad them in a tub and they could go though correctly. They kept me there about a half hour which is an eternity dealing with the mentally challenged. Finally when it was determined that I was not a threat the supervisor made a weak apology. The fat lady said almost as justification, "I never saw a bag like that before, sir." It was the bag that concerned her more than the contents.

Sorry, I know they are trying to do their job, but do I feel safer because these Bozos are on duty. Not at all. 

As you were,

Jay

www.monkeyjoke.com

Touching Base

I appreciate all the learned interpretations of the Sweatshirt of Turin. It proves once again that the readers of this blog are mostly people who are in need of serious professional help.
I flew all the way to Victoria,BC to board the Rhapsody of the Seas. When I got here the driver took me directly to the Radiance of the Seas. I said that wasn't my ship. In an accent I couldn't identify he told me this is where he was told to come. He bailed out and started unloading my luggage. Before I could find my paper work he was gone. Although I would have bet my roll that this was the wrong ship, my name was on the manifest. This brings up an interesting proposition.
When entering Canada they ask why I was coming into the country. I told them I was just catching a ship and wouldn't be staying. The officer looked at me like he didn't believe me. He asked me the name of the ship. I told him it was the Rhapsody of the Seas. He looked at a computer screen to what I assumed was a list of ships in port and after a moment waved me through.
So here is the weird thing. If a guy said he was boarding a ship docked in the harbor, and the name of the ship he gave did not exist, would you wave him through into the country with out another question?
How safe do I feel now?
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

The Sweatshirt of Turin

I leaned up against the railing of the ship on deck 7. It was wet outside and the rail was spotted with water. At the time I didn't realize I had gotten my sweatshirt wet.

When I got back to my cabin I noticed that the water mark formed what looked like words a foreign language. I was sure it was a message from Neptune himself, so I photographed the marks to study them before they dried up and disappeared.

It looks middle eastern in origin and today is Yom Kippur after all. I am thinking it is prophecy, perhaps the formula for world peace. The fact that it might just be random water spots is the last thing that comes to my mind.

So if anyone reads a language that is even close to what this looks like and can translate, please comment and let me know.  It could also be that I have it turned upside down.  Magic writing rarely comes with directions. So, if it is closer to an actual language when flipped feel free to either stand on your head, or turn your monitor upside down. 

Being that I know the friends that read this blog, I am prepared for the bogus translations like, "Kick Me" and "I'm a jerk".  Just know that I have already gone there so only legitimate offerings please.  

As you were,

Jay

Magic Cargo

My last day on board they were loading in the show for the magician Guytano.  This is the equipment that he needs to do an hour show.  I do an hour show with a couple of cases, and I think that is a hassle to travel with.

I am reminded of a show I did at Monday Night Magic in New York City while promoting "The Two and Only".  It was a quick couple of minutes in between the magic acts.  I decided to make it easy and not bring a character, but "talk" to them on my cell phone and then did a credit card routine.

It went well and the audience gave me a very nice round of applause.  I exit stage left and pass by the  magician ready to be introduced next.  He is cradling a dove cage under one arm and a production box under the other while holding a top hat and a magic table in either hand.  As my applause lingers he says to me, "What did you do out there that got such a great reaction?"  I told him I did a routine with my credit card and cell phone.  He thought for a moment and said, "You got that reaction using the stuff in your pockets?" Then he looked down at the load of props he was dragging on stage with him and said, "Shit."

As you were,
Jay

Wall of Ice

Coming in from the right side of this picture is the 40 foot pilot boat that was with us at Hubbard Glacier.

There was a scientific team on board  with permission to sail within a hundred yards of Hubbard.  According to Thomas Ryan the guest lecturer for the trip at this point the boat is a half mile away from the face of the glacier.  In the picture I took of the ship at one hundred yards away you can not even see the boat.  I think that is the most amazing thing about the wilderness of Alaska, it is so expansive.  We city dwellers don't have a clue how big something is unless we have a McDonalds in the foreground. But a mountain face of ice that can at any moment crack and fall this big is really hard to understand.

As you were,

Jay

Moon rise over Inside Passage

I was taking a short cut to the theatre by walking the open deck the last night of my shows. The crescent moon was just rising over the mountains. It literally took my breath away. I knew I couldn't stay and watch for long being on a schedule and the moment itself would be gone soon. All I had was my cell phone camera. I wish I had a much better way to preserve the moment. Ultimately there is no way to record it, you just have to be there. It seemed much bigger as I remember it now. It was surreal, like being part of a postcard for a moment.
I was thinking, before we carried cameras, we had to remember the details of a moment like this and if we shared it, we would use words. Perhaps better words could capture the moment more accurately than this shot. Maybe I need to carry a journal in my pocket.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

For Dixon

My friend Dixon wanted to have a better perspective on the mountain with all the paintings in Skagway. This my last trip here for awhile. Here it is. Always thinking of you Dixon.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Hubbard

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The Last of Hubbard

This is the last run of the Coral Princess to Alaska this season and her last visit to the Hubbard Glacier. It was a spectacular day and there were several great calvings. A few minutes after I took this picture the forty foot pilot boat sailed within a hundred yards of the ice wall and I got a picture of it on my other camera. I will publish it when I get back home.
We are about a mile away but the perspective of the tiny boat so close to it is quite revealing.
Statistics are overwhelming. It is six miles wide at the water, 600 feet high and about 78 miles long. It is fed by eight different glaciers along its length. They call it the galloping glacier cause it moves five feet a day and is one of the largest tide water glaciers in the world. I can't tell you how incredible the sound is. It thunders like a Texas rain storm as it creaks along it's way.
I have to say I will miss it very much. I have taken for granted this biweekly meeting. And it is hard to say goodbye to my majestic friend with no solid plans to return soon. God's art work is extremely impressive. I am blessed with a profession that allows me to make a living while I experience such beauty. I must have done something very good in a former life to be treated to this one.
I have said it before but my favorite movie quote is from "Network News". John Hurt says to Albert Brooks, "What do you do when your life exceeds your dreams?" Albert Brooks responds, "You keep it to yourself. "
I guess I mucked that up already.
As you were,
Jay


www.monkeyjoke.com

Mood spoiler

On a beautiful day in Whittier when the sun is shining and the sky is clear for embarking passengers, the video department decides to play a Barry Manilow concert on the movie under the stars screen. I'm not sure what Barry has to do with Alaska, certainly not as appropriate as Chaplin's Gold Rush in Skagway.
Perhaps it is more of a statement than I imagine. We are not that far from the town where Sarah Palin was mayor for a moment. Perhaps the video department is asking the musical question "why is any one listening to either one of these media anomalies?" Just a thought. Probably I am over thinking the whole entertainment purview. Continuing along this line one might wonder what a ventriloquist has to do with Glaciers? Why did they hire me at my current quote to entertain? Okay, I offer a rationale. Glaciers, one of nature's natural wonders and something one doesn't see often enough.... Ventriloquist. Okay so I am stretching the envelope until it becomes a FedEx package but on these cross over days I have more down time than humility.
I got some great responses from my opEd on comedy. Thanks to all that replied. I'm not sure that what you spend your time thinking affects ones comedy. But I am sure that what we think affects our lives.
It has to do more with my philosophy on life than comedy. I do believe that you attract that which you call for. You make a duck call and you attract ducks not moose. You attract that which you spend your time thinking about. I think there are many funny situations that just happen in life and the comic has a capacity to remember and a forum to express that life event in an entertaining way. But I think one has to wait for the truly inspired moment and not settle for the easy way out and go for a joke on purely shock value. Not that shock value is not a great thing in some cases. I even employ that very method in my Tony Award winning show. Balance and moderation. If I did it more than once in the show wouldn't work as well.
Like I say, too much down time on crossover days.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Perspective on Beauty

There is really no way to get real perspective on the massive wilderness up here. This is a picture of a Norwegian ship in front of a medium size Glacier in Glacier Bay. We were sailing to a larger glacier and passed by. The Norwegian ship is about half a mile from the glacier in the background, and we are about a mile away from that ship. You can see that this medium size ice river dwarfs the massive cruiser. I am told that if an earthquake were to occur causing a sizable fall of ice off the face, the tsunami it created could tip the ship if hit broadside like it is positioned in this photo. Fortunately those events have never come together but humans think they are in control. We are all just a minor infestation, and when Mother Earth yawns we realize how insignificant we become.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Thoughts about comedy

In Skagway the weather is overcast and I am a little under the weather myself. So I sit here on deck seven in contemplation. I was thinking about comedy.
A joke always works on the element of surprise. You think you know where it is going but you are shocked by the turn. Comics have to look at life and see those odd turns and find ways of expressing them.
Of course times have changed and what is acceptable to talk about has become more base. Subjects that were taboo once are now fair game.
I am uncomfortable with scatological humor or what would be considered off color. Today it struck me why that is. In order to come up with that style of humor you have analyze it and study it. To write it or perform it I will have to spend my time thinking and observing that side of life.
For example if I wanted to do fart jokes I would have to observer how I fart how others fart when they fart and the detailed procedure of farting. I realize as I sit here, I don't want to spend my time off stage considering that side of life. It is not that a joke might be funny and make me laugh. George Carlin and Richard Pryor could make me guffaw at some very sensitive subjects. But to accomplish that they had to fill their mind with every aspect of that subject. And as funny as they both were I am not sure either would be the poster boy for a stable life. Who knows but could the things they constantly contemplated have created that tortured life? I am certain it shaped their comedy.
It is true that you will see what ever you look at. If you look at only one side of life long enough you will be unaware of any other facets.
As much as I like performing and as much as I get to perform, I am off stage more of the day than I am on. So it is more important to me what goes on in my brain the majority of the time. I don't want to spend moments like this one contemplating how and why and where the people around me are farting for the sake of a two minute bit on the subject.
Life is just too short and some will trade a lot of that life for a good chunk of material. I just don't see it as a fair trade. That's my opinion yours may be different. As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

My home away from Home

Back at work again. This is the back of the ship, or in Naval terms " the anus of the bucket". If you look closely you will see a row of double portholes just before you hit the water. Count four sets of doubles from the rear of the anus and that is where I reside. But don't try to book that room, it is reserved for us entertainers.
The good news is ... If the ship goes down I'm the first to know. I will abandon ship by swimming up. Ah show biz.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Too much Fun

I hate people who drop celebrity names just to show off that they have famous friends, George Clooney was saying the same thing to me over coffee the other day.
With that disclaimer, place a soft mat on the floor cause a few names will be dropped only as necessary for the story.
Yesterday was JoAnne Worrley's birthday and there was a party at Fred and Mary Willard's house for her. It was smaller than the usual Willard bashes, but no less hilarious. JoAnne is a long time friend who has recently come back into our lives. She is very funny and we laugh a lot. Same with Fred and Mary.
Mostly the laughs were played off the moment and don't make sense out of context. However, Mary brought out the certificate for Fred's Emmy nomination this year. It looks very official at first glance. It is then you notice that the A has been left out of Willard. The academy misspelled his name. They were so embarrassed they wanted it back for correction. Mary said, "No way it is perfect ". It is, after all, the off center Fred Willard who was being honored.
Good times and good friends.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Labor day

Happy labor day. Like everyone else we are celebrating with burgers and hot dogs. Can't believe the summer is coming to an end. But then along with global warming time is speeding right?
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Dr. Loomis Lytes 

Theory of Refraction

This is a graphic rendering of the Theory of Refraction made famous by noted illumination theorist Loomis Lytes, PhD.  He first delivered this idea of light refraction in a lecture for the International Board of Luminosity in 1955.  Although it was seen as incomplete at the time, as new methods of measuring light waves were discovered other scientists have proven his theory to be true.  Unfortunately he did not live to see his work accepted as fact and died in 1965 at the age of 72.   The  Aurora Borealis  is also  called the "Northern Lytes" after the the famous theorist who proposed its existence.

From the non published files of the Museum of Jurassic Technology.

More Pictures
If you look at the smaller picture of 4th street, you will see a gray spot on the mountain above the buildings in Skagway, Alaska. Below is a close up enlargement of that spot.
They are very big on painting the rocks for advertising in Skagway as evidence from the ship logos I photographed for a previous blog.
This one has been around for a very long time.  It is a land mark for Skagway. Now it advertises a novelty shop and Moes Bar.  I am told that the original advertisement goes back a century to the Gold Rush days.  The clock was there to advertise a jewelry store. The odd time on the clock was then the International jewelers clock time.  It is the position they set the hands of a watch when it is displayed.  The hands don't obscure the makers name nor the top of the face.  Years later the International jewelers clock time was changed to 10:10.  It shows off the watch in the same way but it is a smiley face instead of the frown of 8:20.
Some one once said that if they were ever on "Who wants to be a Millionaire" they would have me for their life line.  I was complimented until I thought of it for a while.  To hold that position you have to know a little about a lot of BS.  I guess I am that guy.
As you were,
Jay

EastWOOD
Here is a picture that I took outside a bar in Skagway, Alaska.  It largely goes un-noticed with all the other frontier eye candy in the town. I knew that I had to take a picture of it.  I have a great affinity for wooden Indians, after all I work with Bob the original wooden american.
At one time Sandi agreed to let me buy a wooden indian to put in the game room we had envisioned.  We never found the right one and now with several of my wooden friends standing guard over the pool table it probably will never happen.  Wooden Indians like jukeboxes and lava lamps are something you might grow out of with time.
HOWever, I am reminded of a line that the late Pat McCormick wrote for me in a cable movie that never saw the light of day.  Bob and I are in a pool room, in context of the story, and we are sitting next to a wooden Indian standing beside us.  Bob looks over to the Indian and says, "Clint Eastwood called and he wants his expression back."
Rest in peace Mr. McCormick with the knowledge that most of your lines live on even today.
As you were,
Jay

Resting is for Politicians

Okay. It is shameless promotion time again.  If you are in the Southern California area, on October 29th I will be at the Santa Clarita Performing Arts Theatre for one night only of "Jay Johnson: The Two and Only!" One night only, the Two and Only.

On the ship my last night there was a new cruise director who introduced me like this: "You are going to enjoy the performance of the one and only Jay Johnson, the Two and Only." Some sort of dyslexic reversal of information.  I could see half the audience adjusting their hearing aids.

As nice as it is, there really is no relaxing on the ship.  Between performing and getting ready to perform and the Russian Acrobats doing drunken flip-flops in the crew hallway at 3:00AM I always seem to be tired.  Add to that a 10 hour travel day on two planes to get back and I am ready for a vacation when I get home.  However, after being out of touch for the last week there is so much to catch up on I have to hit the floor running.  Yeah I know this isn't a business for sissys, and they could be sending me to a casino in Death Valley rather than Alaska, but tired is tired.

Unfortunately life does go on here at the Johnson house even when I am tired.  Sandi hired some guys to trim the trees right outside the bedroom.  She thought they were coming on Saturday.  As I was having a dream that I was falling asleep trying to cross a glacier I was awaken at 7:00AM THIS morning to the beautiful sounds of chain saws chewing away pulp at my window.  That is such a pleasant sound to wake up to.  I tried to go back to sleep but I couldn't.  

There you have it, the yen and yang of life.  The spooky sounds of White Thunder from the Hubbard Glacier one morning chain saws the next.  

As you were,

Jay

Gold Rush

There are times when life and art come together in the finest of ways. On the Lido deck of the Coral they show movies under the stars on a large screen video above the pool. Last night it was Gold Rush, the silent Charlie Chaplin feature. I am a huge Chaplin fan and he was never more relevant nor more enjoyable.
The print was crisp projected as video on the large screen in glorious black and white and it popped in the clear Alaskan twilight. I have seen Gold Rush before in run down art house theaters projected with a bulb that was half the desired wattage for optimum viewing. Here it was crystal clear with the back drop of the snow covered mountains of the Skagway bay and no one around but me and Billy.
The movie takes place in the Yukon territory of Skagway during the Alaskan gold rush exactly where we sat at that moment. I glanced at the white peaks just beyond the screen and felt if I looked hard enough I could see the run down shack where Chaplin and Mack Swain braved the cold. It was as close to being enveloped in the world of a film as I ever will be. It could not have been more perfect. The lack of sound allowed Billy and I the opportunity to continue a "color commentary" of our own.
The final scene of the film takes place on a cruise ship. Chaplin has stuck it rich and sails out of Skagway finding the girl he loves stowed away on board.
As Charlie and his love sail into the proverbial sunset on screen, the captain of the Coral Princess sounded the horn and we sail our ship in exactly the same direction in exactly the same bay, in real life. It was perfect.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Parallel Parking

This is a picture of main street in Skagway. That big white square at the end of the road is one of the four ships that stopped here today. In a town that on the off season has about three hundred residents, the daily influx of four thousand trinket seekers is the modern day equivalent of the gold rush.
They say that the real money of the Klondike gold rush was made by the merchants in the city who supplied the prospectors. In that sense nothing has changed.
Oh and my comment about performing on a cruise ship being maligned by some. I am not one that subscribes to that idea. It is very much like corporate shows, which I also love to do. It is performing under the radar. You don't have to pimp ticket sales and it is not eight shows a week. And compare the picture of a glacier to the Las Vegas strip and it becomes moot.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Me and Billy

This is a picture of me and my friend Billy Vader, better know as Lord Vader on the Princess line. We had someone take this for us in front of the Hubbard Glacier. Billy has been a headline comic for this cruise line for thirty years. He was there when this was the Love Boat and has worked with every body in the business. He has great stories and being that I love to collect stories pick his memory every time we get together.
I don't know if he remembers all the times he has been to Alaska on a ship, hundreds at the least. But each time we come to the Hubbard Glacier he knocks on my door and says only one word "ICE". We share a reverence and awe of that phenomenon. And you have to get to an open deck. It is all about the sound. The white thunder. There is nothing like it. The rumble and growl of the ice as it calves onto the sea. Hubbard moves about five feet a day which makes it one of the more active glaciers up here. It is not a matter of seeing an iceburg fall it is a matter of how spectacular it will be. Like Billy I will never grow tired of watching it. In the last three weeks I have seen it four times, and will see it a total of eight times before this contract is up. It is one of the joys of sailing up here. How lucky can a guy get to be able to see all this splendor while working at the job he really loves?
I know that some tend to see cruise ship entertainment as the bottom of the show biz ladder, I don't get it. For me there is no down side this gig. My room is not a suite at the Four Seasons, but get a load of the view.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

PS

As you know I have this new BlackBerry. On this trip forgot to wear my wristwatch so I am relying on the phone for the time. At some point on Thursday the phone picked up a signal from ranger station and reset the time from Alaskan, which is an hour earlier than Pacific time to Pacific. I did not know the default was set to automatically update the time zone. I still thought it was set to ships time which stays on Alaskan time for this run.
It happened to be a show day. The advanced modern technology caused me arrive at the theater an hour early. It was like the twilight zone. No one was there, no techs and no audience. For a moment I thought I would be doing show for an empty house without microphone and lights. Very strange, but totally understandable given the nature of our modern communications.
They say that young people are not wearing watches but rely on the automation of the cell phone as their time standard, claiming it is much more reliable. Although that might seem the modern thing to do, I can assure you it may require having apps on that phone which will help pass the time. There are moments when it is entirely too accurate.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

My time

This is the time I like the ship the best. I talked about it earlier. When one set of passengers has left and the others have nor boarded. The ship is empty. No masses of teaming overweight aging flesh trying to elbow their way through the buffet. Just me and my ship. Great feeling of ownership. I like the solemn strolling along the newly scrutinized decks wondering what the next set of audiences will be like.
Last week everyone was disappointed in the general reactions, especially with the early crowd. The resident comic described them as stupid. When they don't get the jokes what else can it be but ignorance? I don't see is as so simple. Weather, show times, average age and so many other factors contribute to the reactions. That is why I love live performing, you can never figure them out till you are up there and even then it is a calculated guess. You can't judge just on reactions. You just have to be ready to do the best job you can with the conditions you are given. Then it is up to the people watching to interpret what it is all about. You just hang your art on the wall and wait to see. Sure it is more fun if they go crazy with laughter. But we are not paid to have a good time, even if some times we do, we are paid to help "them" have a good time.
Still I hope these new people are smarter than the last. They didn't laugh at my jokes those ignorant bastards.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Glacier Bay

Just got a signal and wanted to share this picture of Glacier Bay from the deck of the ship. It seems that we have great weather for the glaciers and it is rains the other days. I don't know how they work that. It is like the great weather we always have for the rose bowl parade.
It never gets boring out here. Nature is so impressive and awesome. Everyone should see it before it all turned into Taco Bells and Starbucks.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

More than they wanted

I am on the ship as people come back from their tours. I love to sit and listen. Today on one of whale watching tours they actually saw some whales. Usually they surface for a second and are gone. This particular tour was different and the people that were on it we talking.
It seems they got to see a whale for more than a second or two. He was stalking and eventually killed a sea lion. It was gruesome and bloody and as natural as a glacier. Some were offended and turned completely off by the carnage and seemed to blame the tour, as if it had been staged as a show. What were they thinking that this was some Disney ride that features talking whales? They came to see the wilderness and that is what happens out here.
Wonder how many of them would order a sirloin stake if they butchered it at the table. We want what we want when we want it but really don't want to see how we get it. That is my observation fueled by boredom and bourbon and the fact that until tomorrow I am just cargo.
As you were,
Jay

www.monkeyjoke.com

Skagway

First I need to explain. I had to get a new smart phone when I was home. I needed to up grade to one that wasn't powered by D cell batteries. It is a touch screen which I am growing to love. In the mean time, the learner's curve is steep. The auto correction feature and the send key are way to close for my beefy digits. Add to this the conflict between the predictive text and what I want to write. For now I am having to use the delete key very often. The delete key and the send key are also too close for my dexterity. I will learn and the mistakes will improve. I promise to make more quality mistakes in the future.

This the third time in two weeks I've been here in Skagway. It is rainy and cool. For me that over cast sky adds to the romance. There is a correction to a blog last week from here. The tattoo on the shoulder of the waitress at the local crew bar is not simply a big dipper and North star, it is the state flag of Alaska. Being that the tattoo is so close to her ample assets it is easy to miss the governmental Significance.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Stupid Thumbs

Okay so the Red Dog post was supposed to run tomorrow, but it published by itself. And unfinished I might add. Modern technology is great but my Learning curve is very steep.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Local color

This is the Red Dog Saloon not to be confused with the Blue Dog Saloon in beautiful downtown Encino, which is the preferred hang out of both my sons. Although it is just a color difference, this liquid establishment resides in Juneau, Alaska. I don't know why this one is famous, but it is. Perhaps because it is in Alaska.
It is so famous that they sell merchandise marketing its commercially. I personally got a short glass from here just to prove I am a world traveler.
Not unlike Planet Hollywood the fact that you have been here is more important than why you came. That is why you need a proof of purchase. A shot glass is the cheapest proof and like many others today I am now an official patron.
The next time you come to my house and say,"Jay have you ever been to the Red Dog Saloon." I cam just offer you a shot from my souvenir fk
www.monkeyjoke.com

Oops

I am on the streets of Juneau. There are street performers all around. I try to give to my fellow performers as a general rule. I came across a guy who wasn't playing or singing. He was a panhandler sitting on a curb and I thought I should help. He looked down and out. I was reaching into my pocket to get some change, when his young daughter came running up to him. "Daaad," she said,"we have been looking for you we have to meet the tour bus right now. "
I confused vacation overload with destitution. Never realize the look was so similar. Glad I didn't give him cash.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

The best sign

I love this. It is a picture of the front of a building on Ventura Blvd near my house. I had to see it a Couple of times before I realized that they were the address and not just installing the address.
Off on the second adventure in Alaska. I have a new smart phone that takes photos. I will attempt to add some spontaneous pictures to my intermittent blog. I am also learning a new keyboard so the maybe shorter than usual.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Skagway

It is the tradition in Skagway to paint the logo of your ship on the rocks by the dock the first time your ship visits. As you can see this tradition has been going on a long time.  Now it is a challenge to find a spot on the rock that isn't already occupied. Needless to say the easy rocks were gone a long time ago. Just to give  you some perspective this mountain face is as tall as the ship, which is about 250 feet high.

I remember 15 years ago I was on the Rhapsody of the Seas when it visited Skagway for the first time. It happened to be my first time in Skagway as well.

With great interest I watched a couple of guys from the paint crew climb precariously up a makeshift scaffolding to paint the name of the ship on a high rock.  At the time it was easy to spot because it stood out on its own where, "no man had gone before." 

I was determined find that sign last week when I was there again.  It proved harder than I thought.  I walked up and down the pier, but the bushes have gown and the colors have faded so much that the Rhapsody sign did not stand out like I remembered.  

I finally spotted it and was a little shocked to see how worn it was. I understand 15 years in the sever Alaskan weather can do some damage, but this looked like an ancient relic. You can see the faint outline of what used to be the right half of the sign.  The date and three of the letters of the name are gone and what was a hairline crack is now a full blown fissure.

Has everything changed that much in a decade and a half?  Time is so relative, and seems to get more distorted the older I get.  To an 18 year old kid 15 years is most of his life, to me it is just a moment.  For me a decade can quickly go past without much fanfare. Time changes with time. 

I guess the lesson here is: Humans think they are making a mark on the world forever.  As you can see from this picture the earth has a different time table and different set of priorities.  Even when we humans build something that survives only stone remains.  Humans can mark the earth for only a brief moment in time, before she brushes us aside for eternity. 

At first I was appalled that visiting cruise ships would deface the mountain with such high level graffiti, but now I understand that the rocks will eventually erase the trace of the infraction and forgetfully move on.  But for at least 15 years I can say, I was here for the first time, and there is the mark to prove it. 

As you were,

Jay

Marion Glacier

Have a wonderful Sunday... here is a picture I took of the Marion Glacier on a beautiful day in Glacier Bay.  

As you were,

Jay

The Documentation 

This is what I posted in my blog on, Saturday, August 14th:

Whittier Alaska, I don't know exactly where that is, but I can see Sarah Palin from here. We are taking on new passengers under a foggy and ominous sky. 

I took a picture of that moment and here it is now that I can upload it. It was like a post card as you looked out on the bay side town.  I don't know if this is it or there is a bigger town close.  It is romantic and foggy, but this is August, I can't imagine how cold and white it might be in January.  You might just freeze your "romance" off.

Whittier is, I found out, Alaska and therefore part of the United States.  I boarded the ship in Juneau, USA, Sailed to Whittier, USA and then got off a week later again in Juneau, USA. It was like flying from Juneau to Whittier and back.  I might have flown over or in this case sailed by Canada. I never really left the USA. However, I still had to meet with the customs and immigration officials to account for what I might have purchased outside the USA.  I sometimes wonder if the right wing knows what the left wing is doing in this country. Logic and horse sense could save a lot of money.  Amarillo Slim, or maybe it was Titanic Thompson, two equally wise, con-men hustlers said, "Horse sense is what keeps horses from betting on what Humans do."

Oh, and in the picture above, the house on the far, far right, a little off plumb, not quite straight and painted red and full of wasted space and hot air - Sarah Palin's house.

As you were,

Jay

BlackBerry Storm

I up graded my blackberry and this is an attempt to send thumb typing to the blog.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Back for a Moment

It is nice to be in my own bed for a couple of days.  I can reach out and literally touch my wife and roll over with out hitting a bulkhead wall.  My first shower back home, I was too scared to come out of the corner.  The vastness of space frightened me. It is also a shock to look out a square window and see the exact same scenery I saw when I went to bed. 

This is a picture of the Hubbard Glacier from the porthole of my room.  I liked the composition, but that is not the way to view a Glacier like the Hubbard.  You have to be out on an open deck to hear it.  What is known as White Thunder is spectacular. That is the sound that the Glacier makes with the ice cracks.  Not to be confused with White Lightening which makes your head crack.  

The White Thunder is very impressive.  You have to find a place on deck where there aren't too many people talking about their Medicare provider, so you can listen quietly to the affect.  I  just can't get enough of it,  although I will try, since I will see it eight more times in the coming weeks.

Not much new to report. Glad to be home.  I send thoughts and prayers to Dad.  Get back home soon.

As you were,

Jay

As soon as I got back on an airplane all the calm serenity of the wilderness, I just experienced, vanishes. The peace of nature is gone and I am once again faced with humans at their worst, the flying public.

Air travel was approaching the breaking point ten years ago but the magnitude of 9/11 put everyone on their best behavior, for awhile.

But now we have had a decade of the TSA's bullying incompetence, and airport harassment which has not lead to anyone feeling safer. Add to this anxiety the nickel and dime, "stuff them in as tight as you can" airline industry policy and we have finally reached critical mass.

Harvard did a study with rats. They crowded them in tight spaces for hours without food, changed their air pressure and irritated them with electric shocks. In this continued environment the rats turned on each other killing and cannibalizing those around them.

We air travelers are placed in the identical situation as those experimental rats each time we board an airplane.

Ordinary people who might not raise their voice at any other time become rude, belligerent idiots when subjected to the treatment of the airlines. Most every time I travel I see something that makes me want to "pull a Steven Slater". Only I would pop the escape shoot and throw a passenger out, ideally at 34,000 feet.

I don't want to predict doom and gloom here, but the next airline tragedy is not going to be brought on by terrorism, but a passenger going berzerk from being treated like cargo at 34,000 feet. It won't be so much an attack on America as a revolution against American corporate greed. I am shocked it hasn't happened yet.

A service industry can't do this to their customers and not expect repercussions. That is the problem, airlines have forgotten they are a service company, and now believe they are a freight company.

I'm not sure what the answer is but the airlines could start by treating is like clients instead of "seats".

As you were,

Jay

www.monkeyjoke.com

Alaska Wilderness

I have been directed to the local Alaskan sailor "port hang." It is off the beaten tourist street tucked away in a more residential area of Skagway. There are no passengers here, just various crew of four ships in port today. The blonde bar wench wears a red "wife beater tee shirt" that has the word staff printed across her boobs. The shirt reveals a tattoo of the big dipper and the north star on her right shoulder. She must come from nordic arian stock, or she is from Malibu escaping some romance gone bad. When seen through beer goggles she becomes quite attractive. The longer a crew man drinks the more she must push off unwanted and unwarranted advances.
There is no need for the crew to be on their best behavior. Everyone is off duty if they are here. The stereotype of a drunken sailor is a cliche but absolutely true if you walk in.
I flash back to the sea faring days of old, the different languages you hear and the idea that everyone is trying to overcome cabin fever and accomplish the greatest degree of decompression in the least amount of time.
There is a small plaque nailed to the service bar that matches the natural stained wood decor. It appears to have been here a long time. It says,
"Every day of my life I am forced to add another name to the list of people who can kiss my ass".
Arggh maties. Another round of grog for me friends.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Out of the wild

I have not had a smart phone signal for the last two days. I suppose cell towers on a glacier would not be very environmentally correct.
I am learning to deal with my tiny ship board accommodations. I feel like a dog who has been "crate trained."
Last night after my show I met some fans; two very attractive middle age ladies looking very good. They admittedly had come on this cruise for romance with some single men. I said, "Are you kidding? You chose an Alaskan run where the average age of the passenger is 103 and the average weight is 300 pounds? Why not Mexico or the Caribbean?" They suddenly had the blank stare of cougars in the headlights or maybe it was the liquor.
I have befriended the legendary Billy Vader. Billy is the honorary mayor of Princess Cruise Line. He has been with the company for 30 years. He was the original comic on the original Love Boat, and has basically been sailing with this line since then. He basically lives on the ship for months, and calls his own shots. He knows everybody on every ship. The Captains salute him. In the words of Roger Miller from "King of the Road" - he knows *every lock that ain't locked when no one's around* He guided me through crew areas. I had never seen this area before on any ship. Very much like the steerage scene in the movie "Titanic". Party and rowdiness almost 24 hours a day. It is like an underground world of the moors. They have their own slot machines, pool tables, and bars. I had no idea what went on when the ship is asleep.
More on Billy Vader later his stories are endless.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Antic-note

I talked about the size of my cabin. The size has some advantages. I laid down on the bed to watch television last night and realized the channel changer was by the TV. No problem I could reach it with out getting up. The bathroom is so small, I dropped the soap in the shower. When I bent over to get it my butt stuck out through the shower curtain. I turned on the water at the sink and flushed the toilet at the same time.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

On the Road

Whittier Alaska, I don't know exactly where that is, but I can see Sarah Palin from here. We are taking on new passengers under a foggy and ominous sky. I love the ship on change over days. It is empty, I am alone. No one around and the crew is very busy getting ready for the next bunch. It feels like my personal Yacht.
Glacier Bay a day ago was spectacular, a crystal clear sky accented by that electric blue color of the ice. Some one said they saw a bear. They thought it was a bear, because a black speck on the shore was moving.
I saw a puffin. A black bird with a beak and head painted by Peter Max. Unrealistic, had to be a Disney creation.
I have been on a hundred or more cruises and never paid for a single one. I did have to work, but my work is a pleasure to me. However, I know some save up for a long time for a trip like this. On deck I heard s lady say,
"Is the glacier under all that snow?" Some people should just save their money and watch the travel channel.
I'm half way trough my trip. Three more shows and I head for home. As beautiful as it is, I miss my family and "my stuff" at home. Tis the cross of all entertainers.
I just completed a week of questions for the Steve Axtell vent Forum. Amazing to be able to respond to questions from people all over the world, while I am sailing the seas. Some great questions that made me think about what I do and why I do it. It was a pleasure, thanks Ax for the invitation. More later as I catch the intermittent internet signal.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Marketing

I think this is my sixth trip to Alaska on a ship. But it has been several years since I was here. A lot of things have changed in that amount of time.
In Ketchacan (who can spell that) I discovered a new Starbucks. It shares space with a bigger store that sells Eskimo crafts. I thought that was odd but why not, Starbucks are everywhere.
I went in and ordered my usual "grande mocha frap with no whip". The guy said "We have a Frozichino. No Frappachino" I asked if it tasted the same and he said it was the same thing except made with a syrup instead a powder. I said "Okay" and he charged me six dollars. That is about two dollars more than I usually pay, but hey this is Alaska.
It wasn't the same, it tasted different. As I walked out of the store I noticed the sign. It had the Starbucks logo, but in smaller letters it actually said "Serving Starbucks Coffee." It wasn't a Starbucks at all it was an independent coffee bar that bought Starbucks brand coffee. That is the reason for the weird mixture and outrageous prices. They couldn't even call it a Frappachino.
Evidently Sarah Palin is not the only fraud that Alaska has to offer.
As you were,
Jay

www.monkeyjoke.com

Reality

I am on a ship with a line I haven't worked before. I was an addition at the last minute. They met my fee and, I'm a gun for hire so... Take the cash and run.
They didn't have my usual accommodations so I am in the "guest entertainer" section. As I was being helped to my cabin we passed by some small rooms on a low deck, I thought this isn't so bad. But... We kept going, and going, and going to the end of the hall at the very back of the ship. The door marked crew only opened to the "entertainers" section.
I am three doors from the very back. The very anus of the ship, if you will.
The bathroom is smaller than my shower at home and I use a puppet case for my pillow. The space where they store the anchor is next door and it is bigger than my cabin. I rolled over last night and hit the wall with a bang.
However, here I am among my people, the entertainers. That was great until I was awaken this morning at 3:30 am to a hallway full of Russian acrobats singing Bolshevic drinking songs. I was told it was a special occasion and the party didn't normally go that late. They usually start the drinking songs at 2:00am.
Show BiZzzness. How glamorous and exciting. As long as the check clears.
As you were,
Jay.
www.monkeyjoke.com

Alaska

Only two weeks ago I was having a drink around a camp fire with former Alaska Senator Ted Stevens.
Today I was flying to Alaska when I heard he was killed in a plane crash.
The Senator was a WW II fighter pilot and was in a small plane crash in the 70's. He survived that crash but his wife and three others did not.
I did not agree with his politics but our camp out conversations we about other things of life. He was a gentleman. I will miss him although I only knew him personally for a matter of days.
Carpe diem. It is all too short.
As you were,
Jay
www.monkeyjoke.com

Out with the Old 

In with the New 

In my youth I had two pair of shoes.  Black loafers were my preference. One pair was for everyday wearing and one pair was for Sunday.  The Sunday pair was to be kept shined and looking good.  Once the everyday shoes fell apart they would be tossed, and a new pair would be bought for Church. The Sunday pair became my everyday pair.  My loafers usually wore out by starting to flap. I started walking at an early age, and on my toes which I  still do to some degree today.  This caused the sole of my shoes to become separated from the shoe itself and would flap when I walked. My Dad could literally "hear" when I needed a new pair of shoes.  Now I mostly wear tennis shoes, and have several pair of dress shoes when the occasion calls for it.  

Once I get a pair of tennis shoes that work for me I am very reluctant to let them go.  It is only after they fall apart that I will seek another pair to take their place.  In a brief ceremony a week ago I ushered out the old and welcomed a new pair of Tennis shoes.  The new ones become my everyday shoes and the old tennys will be relegated to yard work, painting and other jobs where shoes are expendable. 

So, with proper reverence I said goodbye to the worn out Nike's and welcomed the Reboks into my world.  To document the occasion I took this picture.  Sandi did not understand, nor could I explain my reason for making a fuss.  Goodbye old friends....

Although you can not really read the yellow label inside the new shoes, it says: "Duty Proof".  I am not sure what that means. "Doody Proof" I could understand but question the veracity. "Duty Free" I know, "Fit for Duty" I have heard, but what is "Duty Proof"? If there happen to be shoe experts that know how to interpret this foot wear selling point,  please clue me in.

As you were,

Jay

Are you Kidding?

Yesterday in the LA Times there was a short hundred-word article in the National Briefing section. I love this section of the paper.  These condensed articles fit my ADHD nature by being short and getting right to the point.

This particular blurb reported on the apology given by Irvin Good, Jr, president of GoodTimes Amusements of Pennsylvania. He did not intend to offend anyone with the game he called "Alien Attack" which appeared at a fair in Roseto, PA.  The object of the game is to shoot the "Alien's" with a simulated hand gun.  It seems that some people thought that one of the "targets" resembled President Obama. Here is the official statement from Mr. Good,

"I voted for the man. It wasn't meant to be him. If anyone took it that way, we apologize." At this point I would tend to side with Mr. Good.  In this sensitive politically correct society people can over react to most anything, even the most innocent of intentions. I was ready to take Mr. Good at his word that "It wasn't meant to be him (meaning President Obama)." 

However, there was still room in the short article to describe the alien "target" that caused such a stir.  To quote the article:

The game depicted a black man dressed in a suit holding a rolled up piece of paper labeled "Health Bill". The man sported a belt buckle fashioned after the presidential seal.

Geez Mr. Good how could anyone be confused by that? To quote Racehorse Haynes the flamboyant Texas defense attorney, "don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining."

As you were,

Jay

Good bye to a friend 

I had not planned on this blog,  I don't guess anyone is ever ready for the sudden passing of a friend.  Lorraine Yarnell fell victim to an aneurysm last evening at her home in Norway.  Although I had  lost touch with her, I remember her fondly. Here is a clip of her with then husband Robert Shields composing the team of "Sheilds and Yarnell".

 

For a moment in time the act of "Shields and Yarnell" was very hot.  They guested on the Glen Campbell show for a summer and were offered their own variety show that next fall.  

One of my favorite memories is an extended tour around the country as the opening act for "Sheilds and Yarnell".  We played mostly restored Vaudeville theatres for a week at a time.  Plenty of opportunities to bond with both of them.  Here is a picture from that time which hangs on my wall.  We used to joke that we had the same haircut.

It made for a great show, a silent novelty headliner and an over talkative novelty act opener.  We performed with a full orchestra and it is one of the last times I ever heard the charts for my act played full out.  

Lorraine and Robert were much like Sandi and me.  Robert the hyperactive for whom performing came very naturally, and Lorraine the studied disciplined dancer who spent hours rehearsing.  I adored both of them and they treated me as an equal, not some hired-gun opening act.  They split up the act and the marriage and moved from Tarzana.  I am back in touch with Robert via the Internet and have run into him a couple of time since those days.

Lorraine was the costumed robot in Mel Brooks "Space Balls" voiced by Joan Rivers.  After that I heard she went back to dancing full time and eventually became dance captain on several cruise ships.  I assume she met her current husband on the high seas and they moved to Norway.  

She will be missed but remembered.  

As you were,

Jay