Comment of the Day: The tube system here in London is great.  What impresses me the most is how clean it is. It is not just clean compared to the New York Subways. A coal mine is clean compared to a New York Subway. The London Underground is almost Disneyland clean.  Unlike the trash and metrocards thrown every where in New York, the tracks and stations are spotless. At times you see where the tile or steps have been worn down from years of use, but no vandalism. The seats on the trains are cloth, no cuts, no stains, no gum residue, and there is an absence of graffitti.  Seems like if they can do it we can too. Why don't we care more about our public systems in the States?  Oh well.

Blog: You know I subscribe to the belief that ventriloquists don't go crazy; it's everyone else around them who do.

Case I point:
Because our set is covered in carpet it must be vacuumed, or as we say here in Britain "hoovered", before each show.

There is an English brand of vacuum backstage that is short and round. The manufactures of this appliance have attempted to make housework friendlier, I assume, by painting the vacuum red, and drawing a cartoon face on it. The eyes are either side of the hose, which takes on an elephant trunk-like appearance, and there is a happy smile below. It could be a distant cousin of Thomas the Tank engine I suppose. They have even gone so far as to name the vacuum "Henry" and write his name on what could be considered his chin.

As Julia and I were coming down the stairs last evening we heard a commotion on the steps behind us. It was Ruthie lugging the vacuum down to the stage trailing the hose behind her, which was banging loudly on every step she took. Ruthie was mumbling something about James and how disgusted she was with him. It was not until we arrived on the set that we realized this James Ruthie was complaining about was the vacuum.

The "hoover" she carried was not red like Henry; it was painted yellow and on the yellow vacuum chin was the name James.

Ruthie was complaining strongly that Henry Hoover was absent and in his place was this interloper, James. It was clear that her feelings for James Hoover were not as strong as they were for Henry.

Julia and I tried not to get involved since we did not know the hoovers personally and James seemed to be doing a fine job on the carpet. James, however, was suffering the abuse of Ruthie who clearly did not think James Hoover was worthy.
"I want to know what happened to Henry", Ruthie kept asking with a plaintive cry. But there was no one to answer. Certainly James did not explain and the Fairy Godmother of the Vacuum obviously had the day off.

For the life of me I can not figure out why there were faces on vacuums and why one named James replaced Henry, nor could I relate to why Ruthie was so disturbed by the switch. It seems very British as I think about it. Henry the first replaced by James the suck-sessor. But Ruthie was clearly not pleased.

After watching her distain of James and listening to her rant I knew that it was another case of Ventriloquial Environmental Insanity. (VEI) , People who go crazy when in proximity to a ventriloquist for long periods of time. She had completely anthropomorphized a vacuum-cleaning unit.

One might think the ventriloquist would be the one to start feuding with and talking to an appliance, but no it was the Deputy Stage Manager who is suffering from VEI

Interesting side note, I found out that Julia's parents are psychiatrists. I'm sure that was her main qualification to work on this show.

As you were,
Jay