Friday, February 15, 2013

Carnival on the Triumph

Experience the adventure of real sea travel...
with a new concept by Carnival Cruise Lines.
Tired of frills and the over attentive service aboard a modern Cruise ship?  Have you yearned for an experience that is NOT just the same as a floating hotel? How many times have you wondered what it was like to cross the ocean like our forefathers did on the MayFlower?
Well if you have the desire to sail the seas like the Vikings did in the 17th century,  now there is a Cruise just for you.
Actual passenger photos... used without permission.
Brought to you by the same parent company that gave you the headline grabbing adventure of the Concordia, Carnival is now offering a new way to travel... Old School.  No airconditioning, no electricity and no modern comforts like toilets and showers; just the raw power of the sea.
Dine on onion sandwiches after standing in a long line for rations. Use plastic containers as "toilets" Sleep on the deck under a make shift tent made of sewage soaked bed sheets. Sniff the aroma of rotting spoiled food kept in the galley without the benefit of modern refridgeration.  And more.
Your Adventure cruise my start in New Orleans but where it will end it anyone's guess.  Just like Columbus you will be looking for one continent and accidentally find another. You will creep along at the speed of a crawling baby extending your tour by days... even weeks. And most of all you will have little to no communication with the relatives you left behind.
Yes if the Love Boat is not what you are looking for... Try the Carnival Triumph Garbage Boat.  It will be a tour, a cruise, an adventure and study in the human nature of survival that you will never forget.
Book now... don't wait any longer to grab your headlines. Whether it's "abandon ship" off the Coast of Italy on the Concordia... or limping into Mobile on the Triumph.... you can trust Carnival to make your vacation one that can never be duplicated again.*

As you were,
Jay
*Not intended to be a real advertisement, statement of the truth or comment on actual events. Brought to you by a writer who never expects to be hired on Carnival Cruise lines ever again. 

3 comments:

Pete Biro said...

PERFECT MY FRIEND, PERFECT. JUST LIKE WHEN I CROSSED THE ATLANTIC ON A TROOP SHIP.

Martin Lewis said...

I went through the same thing on the Carnival Splendor a couple of years ago, mind you we had spam sandwiches so theres that...

Daray Pringle said...

Have you worked on Carnival ships ?