The Process of Writing.....

Chapter 1, page 1, first word..... THE, no that's not right..uh... A... A gorilla walks into a bar...nope uh... A gorilla GOES into a bar..... A gorilla from the Circus goes into a bar..... no, The Circus comes to town... that's a better start get the over view of the larger action right up front. A circus is a good image anything can happen at a Circus... I like that.... So.... The Circus comes to town and the gorilla goes into a bar. Would it be THE bar or A bar. I guess the town would have more than one.... Maybe it should be a monkey.... Circus monkey that's better. Monkeys are funnier than Gorillas... I think... The Circus comes to town and a monkey goes into the bar to order a drink. Maybe he should clime up on the stool, clime, that doesn't seem right... clime, he climes up on the.... wait it's spelled CLIMB. What is that all about a silent B? Who made that rule. Who is the spelling sheriff anyway... wasn't there a time ..... sorry... timb when you could spell words anyway you wanted.

Like the word subtle, why isn't it suttle, That isn't even a word in the dictionary, it's not being used. I can understand if you already had the word suttle in the dictionary and it meant something like "yell loudly in a crowd"... like He suttled a curse word at the referee. That would be the absolute opposite of being subtle, so you would have to put a B in the word so you wouldn't get the two confused, you know like to and too and two or their, they're, and there. That's obviously what happened to CLIMB.... CLIME is already a word that means something else about the climate or something. That makes sense to me but that's not what they do with subtle... they create an original word with a silent B even though the easy spelling is just sitting at the dictionary office on a shelf waiting to be assigned. That's another thing... teachers used to tell me if I didn't know how to spell something look it up in the dictionary. Doesn't a dictionary list the words in alphabetical order according to spelling? How do you find out how to spell something when the only way to find it is to spell it out. I can't tell you how many times you can go to the dictionary trying to find a word like suttle and it isn't there. Seems like right next to it they should put... "actually spelled subtle" because the people who write dictionaries should be smart enough to figure that out.

Speaking of that who writes dictionaries? Wasn't that Samuel Johnson or.... Webster, Daniel Webster.... Webster's Dictionary.... do you think he started with A words or just the words that came into his head first? That's the way I would do it, just start with the easy words. First one would be quill, cause he was probably writing with a quill pen... then ink. uh.... UH.... what was I just thinking? Wait, Wait, I almost had it again... oh yeah. The Circus comes to town and a monkey goes into the bar, climbs up on the stool to order a drink. Too long of a set up.... needs to be shorter... to the point.... A Circus monkey walks into a bar and says to the bartender...now I'm rolling the monkey is going to order a drink say a Bananna no banannnaa, no crap banana... he will order a banana daquari ..... dackery..... banana dquary.... screw it... orders a beer. A Circus monkey walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey my good bar keep I wish to order one of your fine beers........... that doesn't sound like a monkey, sounds like Frazier.... maybe that is funny if the monkey talks like Frazier...... Would you be so kind, my good man as to ply your craft and draft me one of your fine.... finest What time is it? oh time for lunch.... well what have I got so far? A Circus monkey walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Would you be so kind, my good man as to ply your craft and draft me one of your fine.... finest" Okay.... okay that works I think I'll knock off for the day.

As you were,

Jay