Saturday, April 27, 2013

Elvis Nugent

Quantum theorists assert that all possibilities for all outcomes in any situation exist at the same time.  I suppose it is the ultimate cosmic "what if" game.  With the current political division in America right now,  it is open to quantum speculation as to how celebrities might or might not be or have been involved in the controversy. Let's just say for sake of a quantum discussion that Ted Nugent died on August 16, 1977 and Elvis Presley didn't. (Note: this is exactly why quantum theory gets "quarky,"  it allows for this very speculation).
Since Elvis died at the age of 42 we really don't know what kind of a middle age man he would have become. Rock stars can't all age as well as Keith Richards, so we don't know who "old man citizen" Elvis would have become if he had lived. I speculate he would have been the NRA poster boy, and I am guessing more charming than Ted Nugent and less dramatic than Charlton Heston, but nonetheless controversial.  

Col. Parker, Elvis's control freak personal manager, kept him from a lot of controversy, but was 20+ years older than Elvis and might not have been able to completely control him in later life. The Col.'s control over Elvis's personal life did not seem to be as complete as it was for his professional life even in 1977.  I wonder if Elvis would have vocalized his support for gun owners's rights in the same way  that Charlton Heston did and Ted Nugent currently does?
There is no doubt that Elvis was an avid gun owner. Las Vegas stories connecting Elvis and guns are very common.  He once pulled a hand gun on a Las Vegas Hilton Security guard who didn't slow the golf cart  down enough when Elvis was a passenger. It is also legendary that televisions needed to be replaced regularly in the Elvis suite of the International Hilton hotel. Elvis did not like Robert Goulet and would shoot out the television screen when Goulet appeared.  Once after visiting a gun shop in Las Vegas the King said, "I'll take it." The owner of the store asked which gun he was talking about and Elvis replied, "All of them.. I'll take all of them."  Elvis bought every gun in the shop, which had to close it's doors for a week just to do the necessary paper work to transfer the arsenal. 
Elvis could have become the Charlton Heston of today's NRA. Heston retired from the presidency of the organization at 75 years old.  Today Elvis would be 78 with enough money to do most anything he wanted to do.  He was never very political when he was younger, but we all change when we get older (except Keith Richards). Had Elvis decided to be vocal on that subject it would have decidedly changed his image. No matter which side of the debate he embraced it would have cost him a lot of his current regal status.  
Since every possibility exists in the quantum field here is the way I think it happened. Elvis didn't die of an overdose, he became a recluse and lost his grasp on reality when the Col. died. All the controversy he avoided in his youth became very important in his old age. He recorded a controversial remake of one of his old hits, entitled, "Iran.. don't you step on my blue sued Jews."  He went on to become president of the NRA and suggest that every American be given a gun with their social security card. He would have held a musket above his head and said, "When they take it from my cold dead hands" while he swiveled his hips and said "Thank you... Thank you very much, Uh Huh."
He retired at 75 from the NRA like his friend "Teddy Bear" Heston; the abuse of drugs in his younger days caused him to become a little delusional and paranoid in the twilight of his life. He died in the shower from a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head because he momentarily thought he sounded like Robert Goulet.  He was eulogised not as the King of Rock and Roll but the King of Lock and Load. 
It could be... have been... or is, or not.  Get a clarification from Stephen Hawkins.
As you were,

No comments: