Monday, November 15, 2010

Four Star

In this picture if you notice the second window from the bow, the square port hole just above the N in Grand, you will see my humble abode. It is indeed the phone booth size closet that they call a cabin. It wasn't too bad since most of the time my world was the screen of an 8x10 Ipad. The problem was not the space as much as the placement. You will also notice that the cabin is less than 20 feet to the bow line portal. Every time the winches were engaged, which was every time we docked or left a port, my small cabin would shake with the force of a 4.5 earth quake and the thunder of metal on metal gears grinding. Not the way one would like to be awaken at six AM especially after a late night performance. It would always wake me but after a few mornings I was able to go back to sleep but did have several dreams reliving the Northridge Quake of 94.
I will be home in about 18 hours most of which will be spent on an airplane. There will be a whole new set of adjustments I will need to make to fly. I will be glad to be home for a little over a week.
I never did meet the cruise director. I did watch him do "his show". It is posed as an impromptu second thought when the lounge pianist sees him in the audience and casually asks him if he wants to sing a couple of numbers. He reluctantly gets up and graces the audience with a tune or two or five. Getting to know Ray the pianist I find that it is highly rehearsed and set up for him a couple of times a cruise. Ray is not thrilled to have to do it. After working with Frank Sinatra this Cruise director is not thrilling.
It is perhaps the most self involved narcissistic performance I have ever seen. The superior, almost condescending, manner he works the crowd is a cliché Bill Murray imitation. He is so full of himself he doesn't leave room for the audience. Where is Simon Cowell when he could really do some good?
After his "set" would have been the perfect time to introduce myself and finally meet him. I couldn't do it. My green room perjury can only go so far. I walked away as he was taking his bow. I figure this guy goes through his day not realizing there is anyone else on the ship. As you were,


P. Grecian said...

I've worked with that guy any number of times.
He's always had a different face and a different name, but the self regard is the same every time.

Bob Conrad said...

"Lord, it's hard to be humble when your perfect in every way" song by Mack Davis. Seems to fit, I think I've had the misfortune to run into him a few times too.