Thursday, July 12, 2007

So, I know how the unrination thing works now. Don't get me wrong it is not that I was trying to discover the secret. The 'bull set" cast just happens to be dressing, or "undressing" in this case, on the same floor as my dressing room. The contortionist starts drinking Evian water about an hour before the show. I saw her in the hall way tonight chugging a couple of liters. I don't know, do you call that preparation, rehearsal, what? I am still confused about the timing. Speaking from personal experience I tend to lock down when a stranger enters the public men's room when doing my own business. How do you "turn on the shower" with 1500 people watching in the audience.

All these years I have tried not to drink too much water because I might need to pee when I get on stage. Here she is, worried that she won't be able to pee when she gets on stage.

Also, what do you say to the naked girl with her hand up the tush? "Hey nice show, a really conviencing performance. I have never seen anyone do it better?"

But the big question is... how do you find these performers. What kind of audition is this?

"Okay will all the girls in the front row strip naked bend over backwards and water the boards... and five, six, seven eight."

"Number four, really sorry honey, your body is great, the back bend was sensational, but the unrination thing was just not coviencing. Keep working on it. Now will all the girls in the back row... make a fist turn up stage and..... five, six, seven, eight..."

I did find out that the dog the guy wears on his head is not a professional. The bull, however, is.
As you were,
Jay

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Totally amazing! Who know such things existed, much less pass as art, much much less get people to PAY to see them.

Bob Baker

Anonymous said...

Jay,
I once did a tv talk show. In the tv guide it said, Rita Moreno, George Hamilton, Michael Jackson's money and a comedian. The monkey got better billing than me... but wait...for you that's a good thing.

steve bluestein: http://web.mac.com/stevebluestein3

Anonymous said...

I did a TV talk show. In the TV Guide the listing was as follows: "Guests include Rita Moreno, George Hamilton, Michael Jackson's chimpanzee and comedian. The monkey got better billing than I...no wait... for you that's a good thing, right?

Anonymous said...

"50 minutes"..."White grease, black grease," "Bulls..., I mean set," are you sure that Honey Bun M is not there directing the entire "freaking performance art" thing from above the back of the balcony? 1500 hundred seats?...how many performances? And are there that many insane Brits that will come to see the "Nazi control freak? You thought North Louisiana was provencial...you should count your blessing for all of us being in your life and not peeing on stage, on cue, and worse yet...on you!!! The thought of that makes me want to retire!
DW&M