True Crime

With all the television programs available to me I tend toward two genres. One is the History Channel, which my kids have renamed the Hitler channel since most of the programing re-packages stories on the rise, fall and atrocities of the Third Reich.  When I tire of that I turn to the "true Crime" stories.  48 Hours, Forensic Files, Cold Case File and a wealth of others shows are on late at night as I am winding down.  It could be the reason my artwork is so depressing since these types of programs are on in the background while I draw and paint.  But that is another discussion.

I find a Sherlock Holmes fascination with the way modern detectives use the crime scene evidence to deduce a felony on television. It seems to spill over to my everyday existence. Take the enigma of the cocoons that attached themselves to the eve of my porch on the back deck door in the last weeks. I call it "The Case of the Black Butterfly."

Earlier in the month I watched as black hairy worms crawled up the molding to become these bat like hangers on the eve.  My first instinct was to weep them down thinking they would morph into a puppet eating moth that would threaten my lively hood. However, Sandi convinced me to let them run their course since they might become beautiful butterflies.

We watched them as they turned more ridged and plant like than insect. Every few days we would assess their progress. About a week later the mystery began.

I looked up in their direction to see something red running down the molding of the door. It looked like blood that dripped from somewhere and dried on the white trim.  Under closer inspection I saw that there were drops of the same substance on the bottom of the sill and also on the brick below.  I became  Dect. Donnovan from the Grover Police Department attempting to decipher the nature and MO of a crime scene. I didn't have any Luminol, like  they use on television to determine if it was actual blood, but it sure looked like it to my layman eyes.  I followed the trail and it seemed to drip in an OJ Simpson fashion to the french doors of my bedroom.  It ended not at the door we usually use to enter and exit, but the other side that is rarely opened.

I didn't disturb the evidence right away since I wanted a second opinion from Sandi.  She was baffled and wondered if the humming birds had spilled the red food-colored-liquid there while trying to devour the cocoons.  Illogical my dear, Watson.  Humming birds eat nectar not worms and besides the humming bird feeder is at least twenty feet away and there was no trail from that direction.

Two days later there was another drip extending from the same place.  It too had dripped onto the  brick with a trail similar to the first. More blood... no body. I thought about lizards, but how would a lizard lose a bloody battle with a cocoon? And if that could be the case, after loosing that much blood why would it return again to be bloodied once more?

The cocoons finally opened and produced a black looking winged creature that was neither friendly nor beautiful. It was indeed some sort of moth that I consciously released into the fragile eco system of my yard.

There has been no more blood dripping.  The cocoons dried and fell off.  Sandi insisted I clean up the crime scene there by destroying all the evidence.  It has now been more than 48 hours, the case is closed and officially gone Cold.  Because of my lack of forensic tools it seems to have been the perfect crime. They make it look so much easier on television.  I can only hope that some day the perp who did this is caught trying to steal memorabilia from a Las Vegas hotel room and jailed.

As you were,

Jay

Logical?

Let me state from the outset that I am not a hunter. I do like to shoot trap and so far the clay pigeon population is still thriving.  It is like a visceral video game to me and I like to test my aim and reflex reactions. I enjoy this occasional challenge to my mental and physical facilities.  But, nothing has to die because I sometimes like to shoot a shotgun.  Eliminating death from the process does not decrease my enjoyment of the sport.  In fact for me, it probably enhances the enjoyment. 

There is an article in today's LA Times about the Soda Butte Wolf of Idaho.  For a couple of decades it has been on the endangered species list after it was hunted to near extinction.  In a few days the ban will be lifted because of a "pork driven amendment" to the US budget bill that was passed a couple of weeks ago. The reason partisans in the area got this amendment through congress, having nothing to do with the budget bill it was attached to, seems really wrong to me.

I don't live near wolfs, except the show business kind, so I don't have first hand knowledge of the danger they can cause. Fairy tales and folk lore tell of the long term struggle between man and the wolf.  From the three little pigs to Red Riding hood the wolf has always been portrayed as the villain. I understand that in some cases dangerous wildlife has to be corralled when civilization comes to near. However, nature has a balance that keeps things in check naturally and most of the time humans should not interfere with that process.

In the years the Soda Butte wolf was hunted to near extinction the Soda Butte Elk population soared. In fact it grew so large they became a nuisance to the farmers.  It was such a problem that sport hunting of the herds became necessary to thin them and keep them in check.  Idaho developed an industry of "tourist hunting"of the elk for weekend stalkers who wanted a trophy to hang on the walls of their den. For several decades it has been a very profitable business for Idaho with tours, gun sales, cabins, truck rentals, taxidermy  and other facilities for the hunters.

Since the ban on hunting them was made law, the wolf population has made a come back from less than half a dozen to its natural level in Soda Butte.  Now, however, the Elk population has been naturally thinned to its normal level as well, making less of them available for wall trophies. This has hurt the Idaho hunting business.  When this artificial economy was threatened the locals pressured their representatives to include a lift on hunting the wolf in the budget bill.  

It doesn't seem right to me and speaks to what is wrong with a Fascist Capitalism approach that places profit above common sense.  Lift the ban and let us kill the wolves so they won't eat the elk that we like to kill for fun?  Oh and it is not just fun; we can make a couple of bucks off the bucks. 

Putting profit before anything else has caused American jobs to be exported and the strength of our country to become compromised. Walmart used to advertise that they were the "made in America" company which only sold goods we made here in this country.  It did alright for Joe Walton and made him a billionaire.  His kids have inherited the mega store and turned his American dream into an abuser of imported goods and treats their employees as bad as the sweatshop workers in foreign countries, all in the name of MORE profit.
It doesn't seem logical nor right to me, but if profit dictates the way we treat the American worker... why would we care about a wolf.

As you were,

Jay

Easter Sunday

Jovial Saturday
The Easter Bunny walks into a drugstore and says to the guy behind the counter:
"Got any eggs?"
"No this is  just a drug store." says the clerk
 "Got any eggs?"
"NO, I told you we only sell drug store stuff."
"Got any eggs?"
"NO, I don't sell eggs"
"Got any eggs?"
"If you don't stop asking about eggs I am going to nail your big floppy feet to the floor."
The Bunny thinks for a moment and then says,
"Then I'll take some nails."
"I don't have any nails." screams the clerk
Bunny says, "You got any eggs?"

 As you were,
Jay

Good Friday

Whether you celebrate Easter with a chocolate bunny, a new bonnet, a sunrise service or you're celebrating Passover this week, today is Good Friday. Here is my wish for everyone. I hope it is not just a Good Friday but a Great Friday for you today.
As you were,
Jay

Easter Egg Hunt

Back in the day when my kids were little boys they loved to hunt Easter Eggs. They liked to hunt them so much that before they were old enough to catch on we would sneak the ones they had found from their baskets and  re-hide them.  The hunt for a dozen eggs could go on for hours. It was the site of watching their eyes light up again and again when they discovered a hiding place that kept us hopping. (Pun intended)

When their maternal grand parents were alive they would usually come to visit during Easter vacation. Grammy Maxine would get into the swing of the massive hunts with the same energy and excitement she had when choreographing a ballet.  She was so creative that most of her projects took so long to prepare the event itself was usually late. This was the case when she stuffed plastic eggs with candy and placed them by the gross around the peach tree in the back yard on Easter morning.  We had to hold the kids off for longer than they thought necessary.

Then there was the ritual of preparing the video camera to record the event which took more time away from the actual excitement. But finally the hunt was underway.

With video cranking and cameras flashing the boys ran to the peach tree covered with brightly colored plastic eggs.  Each boy picked up an egg and opened it to devour the candy they knew was inside, but each of their eggs was empty... no treat inside.  They grabbed another to find that they too were devoid of candy.  Egg after egg came up empty.

They covered their disappointment very well, as they snapped open empty egg after egg hoping the next would hold the chocolate.  By this time the mystery of the missing candy is of concern.  Although it would not be out of character for Maxine to have over-looked that part of the plan in her excitement (she was at times a cliché of the dizzy dancer) all us adults had participated in the candy stuffing so treats should have been inside every egg.  The boys found all the eggs but all were empty.

There was plenty of candy from the sacks used to fill the eggs so they did not go unrewarded, but the empty egg enigma was weighing on us.

Maxine tried to blame it on the squirrels that dominated the peach tree in the spring, but they were ruled out as the perpetrators because of their lack of  opposable thumbs.  We were all baffled.

Later in the day we remembered that the boys were unaccounted for during the time we adults were inside the house preparing the cameras. The boys finally admitted that they had sneaked out to the back yard, raided the eggs, eaten the candy and returned to start the official hunt.

I am still impressed by their acting abilities at such a young age showing such realistic disappointment for the camera. I suppose the apple does not fall far from the tree, or as my Father is want to say: Your kids make you pay for your own raising.

Good hunting to all who crave the chocolate rush this season.

As you were,

Jay

Shooow Bennnis

I think I may be the only one in Los Angeles, perhaps most of the country, who hasn't written something about Charlie Sheen. Maybe it is time, maybe I just ran out of anything else to talk about this morning. But for some reason I can't escape it, so here goes.

There was a video clip on the news last night showing Charlie's black Rolls Royce, following a police escort, pulling into the Van Nuys Executive Terminal to board a large private GulfStream jet readied to fly to Washington, DC.  He was scheduled to perform his arena show there last night. The commentator said that he would land just in time to walk on stage because he had been in court all day. 

On the other side of the country there were reporters talking about the falling ticket prices for his show and the number of walk outs from his last performance.  On the radio the story was about the conversations his lawyers are having to bring him back to "Two and a Half Men" next year, a conversation that Warner Brothers denies entirely.

At lunch with a couple of writer friends the conversation turned to the idea that, after all of this commotion with Charlie Sheen, the ratings would go through the roof  for the season premier of "Two and a Half Men" if he actually returned.  Of course it would send the wrong message to every other actor and celebrity in the business.  

I don't think it has a chance of happening even though Mr. Sheen has been quoted that there was an 85% chance that he would come back. You would think that a show biz veteran like Charle would understand the reason, there is no way the studio or production company could insure him.  Every production has to have insurance, not just for the accidents that might happen, but a performance bond as well.  To have several hundred people on salary staffing a show and not be able to film because of a drug fueled bender the lead actor tied on the night before would cost a fortune. Every production pays for insurance to protect them from that kind of a loss.  The threat of losing insurance was the reason the production company insisted he go to rehab earlier this year.

It will be interesting to see what happens to CBS's number one show this fall.  We won't have to wait that long since May is the month when the networks announce their schedule and do the up fronts with advertisers.  All concerned will have to make a decision soon.  

Part of me wants "Two and a half Men" to go on like other shows who have lost actors during the run.  "Mash" survived the departure of McLean Stevens, "Cheers" prospered without Shelly Long, no one remembers that David Caruso was ever the lead on Law and Order.  Back in the 60's they recast Darrin on "Bewitched" mid season with the blink of an eye and no one really noticed.  But these are different times and the competition for network programing has never been tougher.

The moral to the story is this: If you are lucky enough to wake up one day and realize you are making 2 million dollars a week acting on a television show.... sober up, shut up and enjoy the ride. 

As you were,

Jay

Backwards

I have a couple of observations about blogs. First of all, at least in the case of  "The World is a Stage", it publishes backwards.  What I mean is the newest blog is at the top of the list.  Last night exemplified the point.  The post that was published to test if my new app posted properly was posted after the post I posted to explain the former. See? it is confusing even to explain.  I am sure there is a way to reverse the order, but then the newest posts would be at the bottom, yes? Who would want to scroll down past things you have already read to get to the new stuff? As a dyslexic reader with ADD I would get lost, distracted and confused and end up reading the same thing over and over thinking it was new.  I suppose the solution is not to refer to a previous blog or restructure the entire concept of the time continuum. Or... just assume that the five readers I have for this missive can figure it out without me saying anything. I suppose that assumption is easier to accomplish than messing with the world's time continuum. 

Last night as I was watching a tutorial for the new iPad app the commentator, Lance Barton... no kidding his name is Lance Barton. I wonder if he has gone through his adult life saying, "No not the magician he's Lance Burton, I am Lance Barton the iPad app geek.".... but I digress.  As Lance was showing me how to "manage my blogs"  it struck me, "blogs... PLURAL?".  Are there people who have multiple blogs?  How do they do that?  I find it is all I can do to keep up with this blog on a semi regular basis.  If I had more than one to consider I would spend my entire life writing about a day that never happened because I was blogging all day about it. One would end up blogging about blogging.... which is exactly what I am doing now.

Yipes. Could this be true? Have I come full circle in this modern era of instant mass communication? Have I come to a point when the only variety in my life's activity is moving from blog to twitter, to texting, to email and back to blog before I call it a day?  Spalding Gray once said he couldn't write about anything that didn't happen to him. He had to wait for some event in his life so he could talk about it, he couldn't just make it up.

Okay with that in mind I will get out and see what life has to offer me today.  What adventures await that will become fodder for my lonely single blog?  There will be observations and stories to tell when I return. So... I am off to seek my life... but first I need to check my email.

As you were,

Jay

Okay....

Just when I was sure it was operator error this blog app worked. The reason one needs this app is because the iPad is not friendly to FLASH scripts. We have Steve Jobs to thank for that inconvenience, but none the less, blogger will not work well when accessed by the browser on the iPad. I have been using the email function to publish since i got the iPad, so I was excited to find this patch. It is supposed to be easy to publish pictures so I thought I would try it.

So look what I found on line... A very very happy guy winning a Tony Award. Seems to work. Now if they will just create an app that writes the blog for me with witty and amusing stories...
That's all I got for now. Thanks to everyone who bought a tee shirt in the last couple of days, please forward the site if you think someone might be interested, and thanks to all of you who have done so already. I appreciate it and so do the wooden children that benefit from the sale. I will continue to create new products with my art. Since I seem to be obsessed with drawing on my iPad there should be no lack of stuff to offer.
As you were,
Jay

New Toy

There is a new app for the iPad that is supposed to upload your blog from your iPad desktop. So far it has not worked. I am trying to publish again. If you are seeing this it worked. More later if it does.
As you were,
Jay

For the Non-FaceBook Community

It is Monday and before I set off to do my homework, I thought it would be a good time for a shameless promotion.  Although I published it on FaceBook I wanted to post it here as well, since there are people who are not FaceBookies.

This is a Vent ConVENTion Tee shirt.  (If you don't know about the ConVENTion click on this link.) 

On the back it says.... "I'm here to see Jimmy Nelson." The shirt won't be available at the ConVENTion itself, only on line.  Here is the link 

(if you are so inclined) 

A portion of the sales go to the "Home for Wooden Children".  Besides where else can you actually wear an authentic Jay Johnson design...

Vent ConVENTion Teeshirt

As you were,

Jay

Compliment?

I have been unwinding at night drawing on my iPad.  They keep improving on the art apps and making them more and more sophisticated.  I doubt that my drawing talents will ever keep up with the technology and what is capable with a 1 and 0.  Just about the time I feel comfortable in one format they change it to a better one, and the leaning curve becomes steeper. I have started combining apps to make a picture. I use one for a certain look and open that file in another app to add touches the other one doesn't have.

Over the last week I drew a couple of companion pictures.  One is Dr. Frankenstein and the other his monster. As to why my thoughts ran to Gothic horror.... well it is Income tax season after all. 

I tapped my memory for the essence of Colin Clive from the original film as the model of my Victor Frankenstein.  But, I didn't want to go the traditional James Whale version of the square headed Boris Karloff as a model for my monster, so I just let my mind go.  I was actually proud of the images and printed them out to see if they held up. 

Sandi, my master critic looked at them and had three words..... Good, Creepy and Disturbing.

Now given the subject matter I do not know if that is a compliment or a criticism.  Good is fine and for me and I am okay with any visceral reaction to my art, creepy and disturbing works. 

However, in light of the fact that I have decided to throw some of my art on line for actual purchase in the form of prints and tee shirts,  I may be attracting an audience that is just as warped as me. I find that good, creepy and disturbing.  

I will report back if anything sells and if the purchaser lives near you... you can call the cops.

As you were,

Jay

Fiji Mermaid  and in case you do not know the history of PT Barnum's Fiji Mermaid

JaysonsART Store

On the other side of INSPIRATION

My roommate, lover, friend, wife and mother of my children works on the hit TV show "The Big Bang Theory".  With stories running rampant about televisions sets that are unhappy and filled with dissent, her show is the polar opposite. She is always coming home with stories of the fun that they have at work.  

The AD organises "dress up day", "theme day" and Mark the director fronts a season long table tennis tournament that takes place on three ping pong tables positioned around the studio.  Getting jaded camera men to participate in these activities especially dress up days speaks to the unusual level of cooperation and admiration the entire crew has for the show and each other.  

Scenes in a sitcom script are identified alphabetically. One usually hears the assistant director say, "Moving on to Scene D".  Anthony the assistant director on Big Band decided to make a game out of the scene changes.  Each week the crew competes to come up with the best name starting with the letter of the scene.  After four years the quick and easy names have all been done and it gets more complicated.  Now it is a dual name.  For example the name might be that of an animal and a State.  Scene A would then become Aardvark Arizona (although that entry would not pass muster with this creative crew).  So it goes and the one who comes up with the best name, given the rules, wins.  Other than bragging rights I don't think there is a prize, but in television bragging rights are a valued commodity.

It is the last show of the season and everyone is giddy. Sandi is on the set when she hears someone yelling MY name.  Finally after hearing Jay Johnson and Johnson several times associated with a giggle she got curious. Here is what she discovered: It seems that the naming theme this week is "a comedian and a body part".  When they got to scene J one of the cameramen yelled out "Jay Johnson's Johnson".  He was awarded triple points for a theme with in a theme. 

As they say in Hollywood... any publicity is good publicity. I'd like to thank the academy.

As you were,

Jay Johnson and my Johnson

The Missing Piece

I was strolling through the neighborhood on my way to the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf for my fix of Ice Blended Mocha when I saw something in the middle of the street. It was a solitary piece of a jigsaw puzzle. Nothing else was around it, just the irregular angle of a puzzle part. It glistened in the sun against the dark and dirty asphalt street. I picked it up and carried it with me like I was rescuing a puppy from the pound. I had never seen a single jigsaw puzzle part on the street before and it captured my attention. It inspired me to think about a lot of things.

First, in and of itself it had no importance. I could not tell if it was part of a picture, a design, a sampler or what it was. One of the edges showed a blue line across it, but the rest was solid white. To me it had no meaning nor any particular value. Had it just been a piece of cardboard or paper lying in the street it would not have grabbed my attention; I would have passed it by like so much trash. But its shape was unique, not trash, obviously made for a reason. The very nature of its individuality made me stop and ponder the discovery. This was a unique individual part of a whole with a very specific purpose. I knew it would fit no other puzzle but the one it was cut for but unimportant to a casual observer like me. However, to the person with the puzzle it was very important. It was the most important piece of the entire puzzle, because without this one tiny part, the picture would not be complete.

I was thinking how I would have reacted if it had been a homeless person on the street. I doubt I would have picked him up and rescued him like I did the puzzle part. Would I have seen him as a valuable part of some picture I could not see? Or would he just be a piece of trash not to be thought of. How could I tell what puzzle of humanity he belonged to just by looking at him? Yet people, all people, are individual parts of this life puzzle. People are not just objects, they are uniquely designed individuals, and everyone has some purpose. I need to recognize the unique quality of everyone I come in contact with, like I did with the puzzle part. Because sometimes parts get lost, it isn't always their own fault, they just fall through the cracks, but without them, and their uniqueness, the picture will never be complete.

As you were,

Jay

Internet ART

My son is into tee shirts and wanted some of my art work turned into something he could wear. After looking on line to see what kind of deal I could make to get a tee shirt printed I found Zazzle. It really is an interesting place where not only can you get a small order of custom merchandise printed, you can also put your designs up for others to order from.

So I opened a virtual store for my art work. It will only be limited by the amount of time I have to put up designs and create products. So far there is a limited line of stuff which includes the art my son wanted. One of the shirts is the SiFi vent poster that was on my blog a couple of months ago. Several people said they liked the design and now anyone can have it for the cost of printing it up. Another one is a design I did for the Broadway show which is a Nethernore "The Bird of Death" tee. It never got printed up for the Broadway run, but I think it turned out rather well.

I put the banner up on the right top of my blog, with the two shirts I just talked about. If you click on either shirt or the store. Take a look when you have time, tell your friends and keep checking back as there will be more stuff as time goes on. I also plan to move the merchandising for The Two and Only to this sight as I get the time. If you have any suggestions about what you would like to see or buy with any of my art published here on the blog, I will be happy to give it a shot. They have a wide array of stuff from coffee mugs to iPhone and iPad skins.

For now it is back to work at my real job.

As you were,

Jay

Click on the Banner on the top left to go to JaysonsART Store

What is Beauty?

It was very early this morning when I posted the drawings below.  I spent all day writing and attending meetings with no time to even write a blog. To give my mind a vacation I decided to draw till I fell asleep. Of course drawing didn't make me sleepy but stimulated me till I was exhausted.  I posted the pictures directly from my iPad while sitting in bed, which is very cool.  From my canvas to the Ethernet with the touch of the screen, and never got out of the sack. Eat your heart out Michael Angelo. 

However, the narrative that went with each picture is missing.  Don't know how that happened, but here is what I think I remember writing this morning.  I'm sure the original inspired thought was clearer and better said.

I was wondering why we label things in the world the way we do.  Take for example a yellow rose and a dandelion.  They are both flowers are the same colors, green and yellow, and both have exactly the same function in the cycle of nature. But the rose is something we plant, cultivate and admire as beautiful. Yet we chop up, poison, discourage and despise the Dandelion as an unattractive weed. Who decided that one flower was a weed and the other a symbol of beauty? It was human beings and not Divine Intelligence.

When I was a kid my Grandmother had a flower garden. She loved roses and took special care to cultivate the prettiest of them all.  My brother and I were reluctantly drafted into the service of "weeding the roses".  There was a week or two in the spring each year when we pulled up dandelions by the bucket full from the rose bed.  It didn't seem to make sense to me that we were pulling up flowers that were thriving in spite of all odds in a flower bed.  And we were doing it to protect a flower that did not naturally thrive in the hot Texas summer and needed to be pampered.  I thought how beautiful a bed of yellow dandelions would be, and they would not require the indentured services of grand kids to protect them each spring.  

The philosopher Joel Goldsmith says that all the worlds problems can be summed up in the erroneous believe in two powers, good and evil, or in this case ugly and beautiful.  He believes that a human judgement of good is no better than a human judgement of bad, both divide the unity of the one.  He points to the allegory of the Garden of Eden when the forbidden tree was of the "knowledge of good and evil".  The forbidden tree was the knowledge of GOOD and evil making the knowledge of good no better than the knowledge of evil. He teaches the absolute unity of divine neutrality, life just is, not "is good" or " is evil".  Shakespeare said, "Nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so." Poets, philosophers and artists sometimes come to the same conclusion when examining life.

As you were,

Jay

What is beauty?

What is beauty?